To add insult to injury...

My darling son is not a good eater. He fusses, he flails, he gets distracted. I feel I have to trick him into eating. Like, here, son, here is the best thing in the world for you!, so eat it!

Nursing times at my house are quite a sight to see, I'm sure. If I don't catch him right when he wakes up from a nap (an optimal time to nurse, as he is groggy and doesn't know what the hell is going on and by the time he does, he's full), I have a whole bag of tricks to employ.

Sometimes I sing. Sometimes I shushhhhh right into his ear. Sometimes I rock. Recently I've started walking while nursing. I truly, in my heart and mind, did not believe I would be able to do this...walking while a baby latches on to a most delicate area? A baby described by one lactation consultant as a "barracuda", no less, which is an accurate description.

Yet no matter what trick I use, he just does not settle in for those oft-spoke of long and sweet and quiet and cuddly nursing sessions where mom and babe bond so nicely. At least the last month has proved that the pain of nursing does pass, and I prefer not to think about why (two words: tough nipples), and I was hoping that this whole business of nursing would get a lot easier. You know, just plop into my chair w/ my laptop and surf the net while he nourishes himself. This is not the case.

But I can deal with most of this. Yesterday, however, he demonstrated to me that he has a new trick, a new reason for me to dread each time we start the process of feeding him: my sweet baby now knows how to PINCH, and he likes to demonstrate the strength of his fingers by PINCHING ME VERY SHARPLY, repeatedly, during nursing sessions. All while I'm trying to keep his other flailing limbs from striking me, sometimes while I'm walking, or singing, or otherwise trying to distract him.

I swear, the first time I spot a tooth, this is soooooooo over.